Category Archives: Mentor

Why We Do The Things We Do?

It was Easter and a little girl asked her Mother why she was cutting off  part of the ham and putting it in another pot. The Mother just looked at her daughter with a very confused look. She had never been asked that question before. She struggled for an answer. Her daughter put her on the spot.

Caught, in her ignorance, she was embarrassed. Not wanting to lie to her daughter. The thought came to her, my mom used to do the same thing. Finding a way to look intelligent to her daughter, she said, ask your grandmother.

The little girl, asked grammy “why do we cut the end off the ham and put it in another pot”? Grammy said ” I do not know why your mom does that. I used to cut the end off the ham because I needed ham for 20 people and only had a pot big enough for a ham that feed 16. So I bought the ham to feed 20 cut the end off and put it in another pot. This way I had enough ham for everyone.

Why do you do the things you do? Is there a good reason? Does it serve a purpose? Or have you been conditioned by your environment, peers, parents, church, your fears…

To live life to the fullest, you need to do what you do on purpose. This is only accomplished by asking, why do I do that? Some behaviors will just take a decision to change. Other behaviors will go right to our core beliefs, and even though they are destructive, we will continue on in them.  

When we are faced with such a behavior, a higher power can give us the strength to break these habits. Find people that act the way you would like to be like and spend time with them. You will be like the people you surround yourself with. Choose wisely.

Brainwashing – Did I Need It?

When hitting that point in my life that going on the way I was, was just to hard, I was sitting in an institution court ordered. I had not volunteered. This man came and talked to me about how he was once sitting where I was. John told me about what lead up to sitting, 10 years earlier, in the same chair I was in. Then telling me what he did upon leaving that institution and putting his life back together. It was the first time in my life that I had hope with a real belief that I could turn my life around. The fight was out of me. I surrendered…

The two of us could not have been more different physically, education, and socially. LOL Below is a caricature of myself done a few weeks ago. I am 5’10”. I have not changed on the outside. I could not find a picture that even comes close to John. So I found the closest red bow tie and the age. The rest you will have to use your imagination. Here is what your imagination needs to put into the picture, he is wearing a suit, 6’3″, clean shaven, and a Crew Cut.

Red bow tie

The thought came to me, which was my lives goal. I will not be a puppet!!! 36 years old and I have nothing to show for my life. Yet, my mind is screaming, these people are trying to brainwash you. You know what happens to people that get brainwashed. Yes, I know, they shave their heads and stand at airports and sell roses, or worse yet, they give their life to Jesus and live in a grass shack in Africa or the jungles in Southeast Asia.

It was a terrible battle in my head. Here is my biggest fear in life to be brainwashed. This guy walks into my life, looking like that. No man would willing look like that. LOL He had to be brainwashed. He presents his life in such a way, that i buy into going where he goes, doing what he does.

When I got out of that institution and went back home, I found another man to clear my thoughts with. I knew one thing for sure, if I kept talking to myself, I would lose the battle. I started to say the things that were going through my head out loud. I told the man I found at home, who was also named John, that I thought him and the rest of his friends were trying to brainwash me. He just laughed and said ” your brain needs washing”.

This was a major turning point in my life. I believed what John had said. My progress in the mental diet speeded up. For unlike brainwashing, where you are not a willing participant, I became a willing participant, in washing my brain.

I changed the people I talked to , the places I went, and the things I did and read.